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Friday, November 30, 2007

In Excessive Day-O

Illustration Friday: Excess

The excess of political correctness in this country has reached vomit-inducing levels.

The word of the week is, "Excess." I had no idea what I'd draw, until I saw a news item this morning that some malls here in America were taking a lesson from Australia & banning their Santas from saying "Ho ho ho." (Instead they want him to softly say, "Ha ha ha.") Apparently, some women who make a living having sex for money were offended that Santa was using their trademarked catchphrase. Also, Santas are being asked to slim down, as they're being bad role models for young chubbies. I had no idea I could blame my fatness on Santa. Here I thought it was from seeing Jabba the Hutt in Return of the Jedi when I was in 4th grade! (What's next- they're going to have to dub over DVDs of him saying, "Ho ho ho," too?) And of course, "Merry Christmas" is an entirely naughty thing for Santa to say. Only the term "Happy holidays" is allowed. Give me a fucking break!

The funny thing about all this is that Santa became the politically correct alternative for those jackasses who just couldn't accept that Christmas is the celebration of Jesus' birth- and now he's getting the PC makeover himself. Joe's entire 5th grade glee club repertoire for their "Holiday Concert" consists of songs about Penguins. They're not even from the right goddamn pole! When Joe asked what was up, his teacher told him "It's against the law to sing about Christmas in school." I know all this is nothing new, but what kind of useless jerkoff gets offended if you say "Merry Christmas?" I converted years ago from Catholicism to Pastafarianism, and even I will never understand. Wish me a Merry Christmas, a Happy Hanukkah, or even a Krazy Kwanzaa if you wish. I'll still smile and say thank you.

TTFN
(May He extend His noodley appendage unto you,)
Tony

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, I didn't know Santa wasn't supposed to say "ho ho ho" here either! Your skinny Santa doesn't look like he is going to have a Merry Christmas Tony! HO HO HO!

Anonymous said...

lol tony i told my daughter the day i read it "watch it will spread here, no more ho hoing for santa." ........ unbelievable. may santa say hoo hooo HOOOOOOO as long as he lives. nice posting: michael dailey

studio lolo said...

As ridiculous as all of the PC stuff can be...this still cracked me up. I think it was your great knack for story telling :P I want my Santas FAT and I want them shouting HO HO Ho !!!

Craig J. said...

"May He extend His noodley appendage unto you"?

Ooh, kinky. Sign me up!

TCA said...

You're right, Tony.

But I'm going on a diet after the holidays are over.

Knitting Painter Woman said...

So let's all sing "On top of Spaghetti, all covered with cheese..."
Congrats on getting Excessive so fast, too. I was thinking more along the lines of a "wafer thin mint." www.youtube.com/watch?v=FY2kFR-bFAA

Aravis said...

The world has become too uptight, and needs an enema.

merlinprincesse said...

Very intelligent post, Tony. You express exactly what I feel! And you know what? I'm Buddhist AND a Christian in my Soul and still, I say Merry Christmas or Happy New Year... :) But for you , I will make an exception...
Merry MeatBall Period! :))))
May all your Spaghetti live short and prosper!

steve said...

I hear you Tony. First off the "Ha ha ha" thing is just plain stupid, period. And as a teacher, I have absolutely no issue with someone wishing me Merry Christmas, or whatever they wanna wish me. It's that quiet kid at the back of the room who keeps placing hexes on me that kind of has me worried. Anyhow, nice job of illustrating this.

Larry Lee said...

We were obviously thinking along the same lines. My post has a link to the originating company's response. As usual, the media blew it way out of proportion. Last year it was the bell ringing kettle. This year its fat Santa and Ho!Ho!Ho! Next year, perhaps it will unacceptable for street lights to 'blink a bright red and green'.

Roberta said...

I like the way you think Tony! I really dig your posts. Well done.

ValGalArt said...

Really great to hear from you Tone! I'm glad to see your rants have not diminished since I last visited you! The world would be so boring without you dude!!! Happy Holidays!