Saturday, July 10, 2010

Tony's Movie Rants!

I took Joe to see Despicable Me today. My God, it was hysterical, much better than the predictable (but enjoyable) Toy Story 3. I would love an army of minions! Plus, it had a cameo by Julie Andrews, (almost unrecognizable with an Eastern-European accent,) as a painfully unsupportive mother.

My only issue with the movie is that there are three adorable orphan girls who predictably warm the not-so-evil supervillain Gru’s icy heart. Now I have no problem with orphan girls, but- as orphans throughout literature history have done- all they dream about is getting adopted and what their new mommy will look like. Will she read them stories? Will she give them kisses? But as a writer who thinks about and researches characters, I kept thinking: What about their old mommy? Don’t they miss her? Don't they want their mommy more than anything? Don’t they want to know where they come from, what their family was like? Where they got their eyes or sense of humor from? What Gru had still fallen in love with their cuteness, but instead of adopting them, had helped them find their real mother or father? (Assuming they were given up for adoption. For all I know real mother could have been eaten by a pack of wild yaks.) Yes, there are many wonderful people who take in children for adoption. But like the Godfather told Tom Hagen (in the novel,) never forget your real father.

Now that I’m on the subject of movies and adoption, I think that the trailer for Salt staring Angelina Jolie looks cool as hell. But she and these other obnoxious stars (are you reading, Madonna?) who go to countries where poor parents had to give their kids up and adopt these kids like they’re some sort of trophy piss me off. (Ten points to Tropic Thunder for it's satirical take on this trend.) If you have that kind of cash and you really want to do good, instead of adopting these kids, why don’t you sponsor their family so they can be with their mothers and fathers and brothers and sisters? I think if I was a kid and my parents were alive but poor, I would give anything to be with my family instead of living in lala land. (I’m sure my parents are reading this and laughing their asses off, but hey, I missed everyone horribly when I left for the army and I was eighteen!)

Well, I’m off for a late-night walk. Everyone have a good night. And seriously, despite my perspective, go see Despicable Me. It’s a riot. (Is it me or is Vector supposed to be Bill Gates?)


1 comment:

Aravis said...

I won't be able to see Despicable Me until it becomes available on cable, but it looks good.

Loved your rant about celebrity adoptions!