Sunday, September 14, 2014

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

I spent my day and evening with the Morlocks beneath the streets of New York City. A lucrative overtime shot. Half of it will go to my September dues, and the other half will go to getting my windshield replaced. I suppose I should feel thankful that I'm able to tread water.

I've finally begun shopping for a new (used) car. You would think that it would be simple: Do my shopping online, check out the CARFAX, go in, give it a test drive, haggle a little on the price, pay it, and leave.

No such luck. The first car I checked out, the dealer immediately told me there was an additional $2000 on top of the advertised price, because I wasn't financing. I turned around and walked out. The salesman said, "No, no, wait! We can work something out!" Working something out meant adding on another $2000 in "fees." I laughed in his face, and said I wasn't paying anything more than the advertised price, plus tax, tag, and title. He said he would go to his manager, but I had to decide RIGHT THEN if it was the price I wanted. I just laughed, and asked him who he thought he was kidding. What, did he think we were in a game show? He didn't like that. He then said that before he went to his manager, he needed a $100 "good faith" deposit. Again, I laughed hysterically at him, which was worth seeing him get all red in the face. Seriously, he expected me to put down $100 so he could talk with his boss. I'm sure they would resist refunding it until I demanded legal action, or bought some car from them at some ridiculous price. At that point, I left. At least the experience was entertaining.

The next car I checked out (at a dealership on the other side of Queens) the salesmen were much nicer, and didn't try to hard sell me or add on a bunch of fees. Unfortunately, the car they advertised for a great price-with a CARFAX report that said the airbags had never been deployed, and it had never been in an accident-Had had both airbags removed. Not only had they been removed, but the dealership hadn't even attempted to replace or fix the car. The steering wheel was badly duct-taped together, and the passenger-side bag holder was badly taped up as well. Technically... not deployed. Again, I left. At least they were respectful and didn't try anything ridiculous. I think they were baffled that I wasn't desperate.

Anyway, still wired from all the... not Red Bull... what was it I drank... Monster Zero drinks. Watching old TV shows on Netflix. Maybe I'll play a bit of Borderlands on Steam and go to sleep.



Anonymous said...

How can anyone look at a car salesperson and still believe in intelligent design?

Tony LaRocca said...

Because Satan sent them to tempt us? ;)