Saturday, September 28, 2013

IF: Onomatopoeia

Illustration Friday: Onomatopoeia... splash!
Click image for 1600 x 900 resolution.


Thursday, September 26, 2013

S&M for Souls

Every morning, I get up, and it’s the same thing. I eat the same breakfast, I go through the same exercise routine, I write or edit, I play on the xbox, I eat the same lunch, I just do the same thing over and over. If there was a Satan, I’d consider selling my soul to him just to spice things up. Not sure how much my soul is worth these days. What could he do to it? Go ahead and throw me in the Lake of Fire, I won’t have any nerve endings. It’ll probably be cool, like surfing in lava. Or then I’d be a “Tortured Soul.” What the fuck is that, anyway? I should make a TV show about an artist who can’t sell his paintings, but they don’t sell because his life isn’t “tortured” enough. So he goes out and commits crimes to make himself a worse person - for his art’s sake. Hey, nice guys finish last. 


Wednesday, September 25, 2013

I know you're retired, but...

Tom Lehrer, please write a song about Common Core Math - we need you!
I always get an unclean vibe when online forms ask me to "submit." I'm not into that, and besides, I barely know you.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

At least as of today...

FINALLY - Front page (#16) in Kindle's Science Fiction > Anthologies and Short Stories by average review score. This is why we beg for reviews - thank you thank you thank you to everyone who has written one.

Monday, September 23, 2013

What would my old English teachers say?

Chapter 4 successfully scoured. Total word count so far, 34k. I can't imagine how long this would take if it weren't already written!

Saturday, September 21, 2013

So much work to do today, but I've become addicted to emulated retrogaming. Tau Ceti, Neverwood, or The Dark Eye, anyone? 

Thursday, September 19, 2013


My sweet, innocent, cute, little, sainted, Sicilian, catholic mother bought this for the kids to play with. Just wondering if it was advertised as "college prep."

Sunday, September 15, 2013

I took the kids miniature golfing. All in all, it was a pretty lame course. I was expecting windmills, or clowns that opened and closed their mouths, or land mines... something. I've been very productive the past few days, but I don't feel like doing anything today, I just feel drained. I think I'm going to just lay down.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Can You Imagine?

My parents often ask why I don't write for young adults. Either they want to scar innocent souls, or they're hoping the restraint would save mine.
Chapter 3 scoured, total word count is now 25,284. This editing jazz goes a lot quicker when work doesn't get in the way.

Monday, September 09, 2013

Well they're right, damn it!

Just Another Day

Once again, I am a gentleman of leisure. This was expected, since the jobs I've been on recently were school renovations, and today is the first day of school. My daughter finally had her dental work done last week. Due to her over-sensitivity, she had to be put under at Mount Sinai in Manhattan. The poor kid was throwing up blood-mixed anesthesia when it was over. It's pretty common, but horrifying to see. Of course, you have to brush it off like it's nothing. After a day or so, she was her old self.

I had a typically odd dream. I was having a conversation with the late Peter Bergman of the Firesign Theatre, and Bill Mumy. They told me they had enjoyed my book, but wanted to act like they weren't too impressed, sort of a "you done good kid" attitude. I got Bill Mumy's autograph for Joe - he's a huge Babylon 5 fan, and we all sang "Fish Heads." At the end, Brian (the dog from Family Guy) wrote a poem on a doughnut about how he was "A-OK." Please feel free to interpret. 

I'm determined to finish editing chapter three, and even possibly chapter four by Sunday. Somewhere in there, I want to catch some sort of indie film in Manhattan, while I have the time. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know.

Other than that, life is the same.


Friday, September 06, 2013

Happiness, Luck, Probability, and other Lost Causes.

Happy thought of the day - we base way too much of our happiness on things that don't matter, and / or are beyond our control.

One of my favorite Android time-wasters is a game called Dope Wars. It's a buy-low / sell-high affair, except what you're buying and selling is drugs. Cops, pimps, guns, banks, and loan sharks are thrown in for good measure, along with a (standard play) thirty-day time limit. The only way to make a killing is to be lucky enough to have something in your inventory sell at "unusual prices."

Now, since the prices each day are random, you can say that if you make a killing, you have "good luck" and if you wind up in debt, you have "bad luck" (I personally consider anything over ten million dollars a win.) But what does this mean? There is no such thing as random. When a computer picks a number at random, what it's actually doing is picking a number based on an algorithm with a seed based on the thousandth of a second in which the request is made. This is impossible for a human to time, so the result seems random.

If you're a compulsive person and play the game a lot, this can affect your mood. You can be happy and feel validated that you have "good luck" if you win, or, more often (since the algorithm is slated that way to make the game more challenging) you have "bad luck" if you lose - which can piss you the fuck off and make a bad day worse.

All because of the thousandth of a second in which you tapped that button.

Something to think about.


Tuesday, September 03, 2013

Today's happy thought: Fixing problems is fun!

Monday, September 02, 2013

Positive thought of the day: It hasn't always been a perfect life, but it has been an interesting one.

Sunday, September 01, 2013

Just another traffic jam

Today I am thankful that every person in this picture has their own fantastic, important world, full of pain, joy, love, hate, wonder, and boredom existing between their ears. Also, that being a three-day weekend, today's shitty traffic is probably better than tomorrow's. I'm also grateful that my car has not yet self-destructed like the Bluesmobile.